Doubt

One of the last books we read in my Modern American Literature class this summer was H.D.'s Trilogy. It's a religious epic (in three parts), in which she establishes a new religion (whether she was serious about actually guiding followers to practice this new religion is of course up to your interpretation). Anyway, my professor recommended that we read T.S. Eliot's "Four Quartets" if we enjoyed H.D.'s Trilogy. During class discussion, my professor wanted to point out all the period details in Trilogy which placed H.D.'s work into the context of WWII England. At least in looking for the lasting, universal message of a work, I think it's sometimes beneficial to divorce a work from its context; I seemed to get something entirely different from Trilogy than my professor did. I feel that my analysis of "Four Quartets" is also probably a bit out-of-context but hopefully relatable.

Anyway, this particular passage spoke to my personal experience of doubt:

"There is the final addition, the failing
Pride or resentment at failing powers,
The unattached devotion which might pass for devotionless,
In a drifting boat with a slow leakage,
The silent listening to the undeniable
Clamour of the bell of the last annunciation."
-from Quartet No. 3: The Dry Salvages

Over time, a person can become disheartened as they may begin to doubt their faith in God, or more generally the divine. Hence, this "resentment at failing powers." This passage may seem pretty obvious in its meaning, so sorry if I'm boring you in my analysis of it.

The next part really resonates with my experience. "Unattached devotion which might pass for devotionless." I've experienced disappointment in my religious experiences. My bitterness, I suppose, could indicate my "devotionless"-ness, or my unbelief. "Unattached devotion" perfectly describes my desire to define my view of the meaning of life, or God, or whatever it is we're all trying to figure out. This devotion, I think, would not necessarily have to be directed toward a traditional divinity but could instead become a "devotion" to science, or something of the sort. Simply devotion to whatever system of thought a person determines to be true. Mine is still not completely defined. It's a journey, and a long one, too.

"In a drifting boat with a slow leakage." Unanchored, in search of a destination, doubt wears a hole in the seeker's faith, or belief, slowly causing the boat to sink unless the seeker reaches a conclusion soon, the shore, the promised land.

"Silent listening to ... the last annunciation." The last announcement of the descent of the divine. Silent in awe? Silent in doubt? Silent in disbelief? The first or the last options are best for the seeker's mental and/or spiritual well-being. Of course, believers in different ideologies would differ on which of these alternatives is best. Doubt can be helpful, as examining why you believe what you believe is important. I think all would agree, though, that doubt ought to be a transitory state, as it wears away joy and contentment in everyday life.